Eye hate

Right, so that pink eye I thought I had? Well, it turns out I was wrong on that front. I don't have pink eye, I have Iritis.

"And just what is that?" I can all but hear you asking. Iritis is essentially arthritis of the iris, and what that boils down to is that my iris is inflamed.

My iris is inflamed.

And usually people tend to get this shit when they have arthritis in other places on their body, but then the opthamologist says that sometimes people will just get Iritis for no fucking reason. It was at that point I literally felt my face form the >:| expression. Except my left eye was all bloodshot and watery. So pretty.

Anyway, I'm on drugs now, so at least I no longer look like Itachi "emo tears of BLOOD when he uses Amaterasu" Uchiha, which is really a good thing, because emo tears of blood are just about that last thing I want to shed.

The blood of the children banging on my mutherfucking walls on the other hand... Have I mentioned before how much I loathe children? Because I really do. Loathe them. With all my heart.

Huh. My virus scanner just popped up with a message that said, "Test cannot be started because it already does not exist."

ANYWAY, back to the topic, my wonderful happy great FUN TIME EYE CONDITION that is totally the greatest thing that ever happened to me!!! Lies, lies, lies.

Those drugs that I said I was on? Well, they're eye drops. I don't really handle forgine objects going onto my eye very well.

Sure, Trev calls me a hypocrite, because I frequently freak him out by touching my bare eyeball, but that is completely different from the eye drops! At least I know where that finger comes from, and exactly what it'll do to my eyeball when it comes in contact with it! I just don't like things that are not attached to me touching my eyeball, alright?

Oh, but epic lulz were had at his expense, thanks to Brawl! Firstly, I completely thrashed him as King Dedede while I was Pikachu. Now, this isn't very lol worthy, but the fact that I was playing with a Wiimote instead of my usual Gamecube controller, had only one eye open because the other was fucking inflamed, and wasn't even wearing my glasses (which meant that anything that wasn't within a foot and a half of me lost all detail) is cause for much laughter. Even better was his excuse that he wasn't used to playing as Dedede. And when I pointed it out that I couldn't really see the game, and yet still beat him, my mom laughed at him. That made my night XD

And the second humiliation of Trevor came just last night! In order to clear the "get 400 or more combos in Training" challenge, I built a stage with little C-shaped nooks into which I could corner a character and attack them with rapid punch characters like Sheik and Kirby. I told Trev about this stage, so he asked to fight me on it. So we go there with our best characters (Sheik for me and Sonic for him), and I proceed to get him into a corner and rapid punch his damage all the way up to 999%. And let me just say that that took a couple of minutes, and I spent those minutes laughing and not looking at the screen while he tried pretty much everything to escape my onslaught. He only managed to escape because I backed off, and that was so I could launch him off the screen. The next humiliation in that round came when I KO'd him by using Sheik's Vanish on the same day that the Smash Dojo said, "There’s something really intolerable about getting KO’d by this move."
And then I pissed him off even more when I kept evading his grab and throw attempts and KO'd him three more times while laughing like a twelve year old girl on crack.

Being a horrible person can be so much fun!